Betty was the apple of my eye.

She’s Chinese and was carrying an eight-month-old boy. I tried to speak to the boy so that  I could eventually speak to Betty.

It worked.

Betty knew she was god’s gift to men.

She was born with that gift.

I was having a Jack Shepherd moment ( Don’t Get Caught)

I became a blubbering idiot.

The cafe was near the large edifice of worship called St Josephs. I knew a Saint Thomas once. Fuck, I’d even tell Betty I was a Christian if only she’d give me another mocking smile.

Only Chinese here.

That’s really fine by me.

Are you mumma?

Betty says she isn’t the mumma.

See how pathetic  I was becoming.

The young female staff who served me drinks weren’t half bad either.

‘Good marketing technique,’ I winked and nudged to Dedi , the Chinese seller of curry chicken stand.

I’ll be back again, I said. If they were pig dog ugly, I most likely wouldn’t be back, I added. Mind you, my tastes are wide and varied.

I don’t think Dedi knew what I was talking about.

I even let a young boy of ten practice his English with me.

I played the concerned teacher here in Asia to save them the purgatory of not speaking it.

If it got me closer to Betty, I’d resort to such low tactics.

But the food was nice. It was noodles and some kind of Chinese bread soaked in soup.

I said I’d be back.

I had no idea of Betty’s availability. She could have been the wife of the guy who served me the soup for all I know and care. Most likely she was just a customer. A big group left at the same time. She was the only sexy straggler.

I’ll  have to tread carefully.

But getting an eyeball of sweetness isn’t a crime.

Betty wore these funny shaped jeans with a label that said Gucci and didn’t she look fabulous in them. And did I tell you about her black silky hair and Chinese killer looks? I thought I didn’t.

Those jeans were in fashion when I was in Vietnam over seven years ago. It’s really good to see them having a revival, I wanted to say to Betty. But she’d just look at me and think I’m a dirty old caught in the head lights of beauty.

She wouldn’t be half wrong, either.

Betty Boop is alive. She’s been reincarnated as  a Chinese Goddess.  She’s in Indonesia somewhere. And yes, I did meet her.


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