This is imaginary dialogue only and unorthodox review of The Inquisitor and the Maiden: Caliphate by Michael R. Davidson

I was blown away by the breath of the novel.
‘You should be, it took me a year to research.’
It was a swashbuckler of all proportions.
‘Yes, but it had a story. And you may have noticed, no one dressed up with tights showing off their protruding balls.
Why be a target.
‘Actually, crotches were targets.’
Down and dirty hay?
‘It had chivalry too.’
Lots of it.
‘Did you notice anything?’
Yes, the Dominican monks were having a field day.
‘The Inquisition was different to Spain.’
I bet it was. It seems it was more about lining their pockets than reforming the heathens.
‘It was also a genocide of a culture. The Muslims were forced out of their homelands.’
I know, and churches built over mosques. Same thing happened in the New World.
‘I tried to keep my fight scenes real.’
I know. I suspect that you have done your fair share  of sparring.
‘Cut myself a few times. Some superficial wounds aren’t as bad as the mortal ones, as you read in the book.’
Who do you think could portray your man in a movie?
‘Not someone in tights.’
The book captivated me.
‘It should. Not only do I know the region intimately but I know the language too.’
‘Shit eaters’ and ‘touching the balls’, very colloquial indeed.
I was so impressed, I’ve downloaded the sequel.
‘More surprises. No one ever reads my novels, so you’ll be the first to read the series.’
You deserve a larger readership.
‘I don’t care. It keeps me busy and while it’s fun, I’ll continue writing.’
I felt a bit of Harry come out in this book.
‘Very perceptive of you. You have a broad lens.’
I like photography too, how perceptive of you.

‘Now don’t be a smartass, you know what I mean.’

I put my hands up. This guy knows his fencing. I wouldn’t dare be petulant.


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